i grow tired..  इ ग्रो तिरेड

walking the path that i choose at times i grow tired..  not of the path..  not of the walking.. but of others ideas trying to "infect" the soil of my psyche.. 

what i mean is..  look hard enough into any "issue", with beliefs of how the issue may manifest and surely you will find that the "issue" is rooted in your beliefs about the "issue"..  an easy example = you have a torn hamstring, you go to the physical therapist that has many beliefs about torn hamstrings, lets say this therapist is deeply studying the fascia system of the body, your torn hamstring will most likely be a facia issue in his mind, you take that same torn hamstring to someone who is deeply rooted in the chakra system and that same hamstring will have roots in the charkra system, again...  you take that same hamstring to someone who is into the Psyche of a person and they will surely find the roots of your hamstring in something to do with your childhood.  So where the hell does it manifest? 

Each of these therapists would be interpreting "source" "god" "unconditional" at different levels on a horizontal plane.  Each with interpretations that have to be poured through there belief systems, not to mention every other system of the body, by the time "source" makes it through the maze of the individual it has been skewed in more ways than care to or possibly could count.  then this same person must communicate this "interpretation" to you which is more skewed, and then you must "interpret" there communication which has to run through the entire maze which is you! 

i grow tired of these interpretations..  i know the cleaner the mirror of the "individual" the less taint will come through their interpretation of source..  do i know that?  i think so.. at least it feels true in this moment, and if that is the case that their mirror is "clean" and their interpretation is very close to the "truth" i still have to move that through my "dirty" mirror..  how f.d up is that =) 

so.. what does this all mean to me?  it means look for masters whom you believe are "cleaner" mirrors..  learn from them..  be open..  practice sacred listening..  practice looking within and observing self..  and one day..  when you feel "clean"  when you feel connected...  when you feel your interpretation is getting close to "source" with less taint..  start to "listen" to yourself..  start to be your own "guru"..  start to trust yourself and your intuition..  ALL OF THE ANSWERS ARE WITHIN YOU..  we just each need to be "clean" enough to see the true reflection, and "hear" the true reflections..  one day..  we will all learn there is only ONE master..  the master that is within each of us... the master knocks so hard at the door of you..  all you have to do is open the door...